Hints
On Family Worship
We have seen in the last two weeks that one of the most important
factors contributing to the state and health of the Church in any generation is
the emphasis or lack of emphasis on family religion. We have also seen that in
a Christian home, it is the God-ordained duty of the covenant head of household
to ensure that family religion is maintained. How is it maintained? No less
than through daily family worship and systematic catechising. In this article,
we shall discuss the elements and conduct of family worship by way of a Q&A
on the subject.
Who is
responsible to start, call for and maintain family worship?
The covenant head of household, namely the father in a Christian family is
responsible (Eph 5:25-26; 6:4). If the head of household is not a believer or
does not live in the house (for whatever reason), the eldest son who is a
believer or the mother should take over the responsibility.
Who are to
participate in family worship?
All who are in the house under the charge of the covenant head of household are
to participate. This includes unbelieving covenant children, live-in domestic
helps, as well as any guests who are staying with the family (cf. Ex 20:10).
When and how
frequently should family worship be carried out?
There is no hard and fast rules (cf. Deut 6:7). Family worship should be
regarded as an integral part of a family’s responsibility and as much time as
possible should be devoted to the exercise. Each family should worship together
at least once a day, but if possible, twice a day: once in the morning and once
in the evening would be ideal (cf. 1 Ch 16:40). In any case, the time for
worship should be regular, specified, and adhered to as much as possible. In
this modern high pressure society it is generally very difficult to get the
family together except at meal times, so I would recommend that that family
worship be worked around meal times. Many families prefer to have worship after
their meal, but in my family we have found it advantageous having it just
before our meals —never mind the food getting a little cold. Each family, with
the father taking the lead, must work out its own schedule which can be
observed with some discipline and consistency.
How long
should family worship be?
Again there are no rules. Some families can only afford 10 minutes
each day, some can afford more. The key is not to rush through worship so that
it becomes a mechanical exercise to be get over with rather than enjoyed. Also
the father (or whoever is leading in worship) should discern the specific needs
of the family. If there are very young children for example, it may be
difficult to have worship any longer than 15 minutes. In which case, the family
should not be forced to sit through an hour of worship lest resentment and
irritability develops. Keep the worship time short and succinct, say 20-25
minutes if possible.
What are the
elements of family worship?
All the elements of public worship except the administration of
sacraments may be included in family worship. Thus Scripture reading, prayer,
singing of psalms, exposition of the Word (and catechising) may be included.
The head of household should lead in all these areas with solemnity and
reverence. In addition, I believe that family worship ought to be less formal
and more flexible than public worship, and so I would allow some discussion of
doctrinal or theological subjects passage read or a sermon that was heard on
the …cont p. 3 Lord’s Day
(cf. 1Cor 14:34-35; Deut 6:20). I would even allow "responsive
reading" or having each member of the family read a verse in turn. This
will help to keep the attention of both younger children as well as tired
adults!
How do I
start? I do not know how to expound the Scripture.
May I suggest that it is the duty of the head of household to be instructed in
the Word by reading and self-study before he is able to instruct his family.
But if you are unable to do so, one suggestion is to make use of a devotional
commentary (e.g. Matthew Henry’s) or a daily devotional guide (e.g. Spurgeon’s Morning & Evening,Tabletalk by Ligonier Ministries or even IDE
Thomas’ Daily Devotions from
the Puritans). Another excellent alternative is to make use of books such
as Calvin’s Truth for All
Times or Thomas Watson’s Body of Divinity or Thomas Vincent’s Exposition of the Shorter Catechism.
I do not think that it is wrong to read from these during family worship. But a
point must be made to adapt and simplify the lesson so that the youngest in the
family may benefit from the study. Remember also that if you are reading a passage
of Scripture, that there is no necessity to read an entire chapter each time.
Rather, carefully divide the chapter into logical passages and read one such
passage a day (a Study Bible may be helpful for this purpose). Remember also
that there is no need to explain and expound every verse in the passage. Do
seek wisdom from the Lord (Jas 1:5) to know what to emphasise.
I would like
my family to sing as part of our worship, but my repertoire of hymns is very
small, what can I do?
When my family and I started family worship, I had the same problem, and after
a while we gave up singing altogether. Providentially, we met Ps Jeff ‘O Neil
who gave us a few copies of the Scottish Psalter. Straightaway we had a more
than adequate supply of not only theologically accurate, but also inspired
hymns to use for all-purpose. Moreover, we could sing any of the psalms without
difficulty. You see, the Scottish Psalter, may be sung to any Common (8.6.8.6)
Meter Tune, many of which are very familiar tunes, such as Amazing Grace,O God our Help
in Ages Past, I Sing the
Mighty Power of God, The
Lord is My Shepherd, Lead Me to Calvary etc.
Get a list of these tunes from me. Do let me know also if you would like a few
copies of the Psalter for use at home.
Finally, what
are the keys to endurance, seeing that there is so much to distract us away
from our duty of family worship?
Firstly, a determination to honour and please the Lord by exalting the name of
Christ in the home, on the part of all, but especially the father. Secondly,
consistency. Try not to allow anything detract you from family worship at the
specified time (this is why working it around meal times is helpful—not only
would the family gather automatically together, but few people will call by
phone or in person at dinner time). Thirdly, flexibility. Be ready to make
adjustments that may be necessary because of unplanned circumstances. For
example, be prepared to have worship at another time slot if the regular slot
is not available for one reason or another.
May the Lord grant you much help as you endeavour to obey Him and
to build up the church within the family which the Lord has placed you in, or
placed you as a steward of.