CHILDREN
IN WORSHIP
It
is an interesting fact that most Christian worship halls in Singapore have
a little room which is designated a ‘cry room.’ Ask around what is the function
of a ‘cry room,’ and you are likely to get a response to the effect: “The cry room
is a play room in which mothers, with infants and toddlers who are too young
for Sunday School, can sit in during worship service.” This statement reveals
several facts with regards to the modern use of the cry room and the place of
children in worship in general. Firstly, most cry rooms today are soundproof
rooms which are separated from the main worship hall with a glass panel, or
connected by close-circuit TV. Mothers who use the cry room can in fact observe
or at least listen in to the worship service. Secondly, cry rooms are designed
to isolate noisy children from the congregation so that no one will be
disturbed by their noises. Generally mothers with their young children would
use the room for the entire service: they go into the room at the beginning of
the service and stay there to the end of the service. Thirdly, many who use cry
rooms generally do not follow the form of the worship service. For example,
parents may sit throughout the service even at the times when the congregation
is required to stand. This is especially so when there is no immediate visual
link with the main worship hall, such as when the room is not separated by a
glass panel. Children, on the other hand, are usually allowed to play freely in
the rooms. Indeed, some cry rooms are even equipped with play mats and toys.
When cry rooms are so used, it is no wonder that many
a church soon begin to organise nurseries, crèches and even full-fledged Sunday
Schools. Why let the children play in the cry rooms and disturb their parents when
you could maximise the use of the time to teach the children some biblical
truths or get them to do some ‘biblical activities’? What’s more, not only
would a new area of service be created, but parents could worship in peace!
So prevalent is this concept of the cry room and its
logical derivatives, that most of us, I am quite sure, would be surprised when
told that cry rooms in earlier days,—meaning, till less than 50 years ago,—had
very different functions. ‘Cry rooms’ or ‘crying rooms’ were literally for the
purpose of crying. You see, it had always been a common practice that children,
toddlers and infants all worship together with their parents. When a baby or
toddler cries, he is brought immediately into the crying room in order that his
cry may not disturb the rest of the congregation. He stays there until he stops
crying, and then he is brought back into the worship hall again. In the same
way if a toddler or a young child needs to be disciplined for being rowdy or
irreverent during the worship service, this room could also be used. Again the
child is brought back into the worship hall after appropriate admonition.
How did the original function of the cry room so
disappear from modern Christianity that few know why the room is called a ‘cry
room’ today? I believe the answer is two-fold.
First, I believe that it is because most of us today
have a pragmatic, rather than biblical or theological, attitude when it comes
to worship. This attitude appears even in churches, which have children
worshipping with the adults, such as when a mother tells a child to keep quiet
during worship service it is for no other reason than not to disturb other
worshippers. With this attitude, it would not be uncommon to see parents
entertaining a toddler by playing during worship service so that the child
would not cry for attention.
Secondly, spurred by pragmatism, many a church today
develops the idea that children have special needs, which are distinct from
that of adults. By this reasoning, it is thought that it makes no sense to have
children sit through “adult worship services.” One respected writer, for
example, complains that “there is an almost superstitious idea abroad in the
churches that if the children are made to sit through adult sermons, God will
be especially pleased, and some spiritual benefit will wash off on them whether
they understand anything or not.” The writer is, I suppose, referring to the
more conservative churches in the United Kingdom.
It is not difficult to see from our lengthy
introduction that we do not agree that children should be taken out of worship
services into separate programmes, whether formal or informal. We are, of
course, not denying the usefulness of a crying room when properly used. In
fact, we are not even opposed to the use of crying rooms to train children who
are still not used to sitting quietly in public worship with the whole
congregation. What we must attempt to do, however, is to provide some biblical
basis for our belief lest we become legalistic in our practice, or be easily
swayed by new innovations “to cater to the needs of our children.”
Let me suggest five reasons why we ought to keep our
children with us during worship and why they must be trained to attend to
worship reverently.
God’s Covenant
The first reason why we should keep our children in
our worship services is that God is not only concerned with us individually,
but with our families. This is by virtue not only of biblical examples of God’s
dealings with families (e.g., Lk 19:9;Acts 16:31); but by the biblical
assertion that: “the promise is unto you, and to your children” (Acts 2:38–39).
The Apostle Peter, who first enunciated these words, was clearly referring to
the Abrahamic covenant (Gen 17:7; cf. Gal 3:13–14, 29) in which God instructed
Abraham to circumcise his male children because among them would be the
“children of the promise” (Rom 9:8; Gal 4:28). This is also why we baptise our
infants. The Church is essentially God’s covenant people, whether in the Old or
New Testament. It is an organic body comprised of families and not just
individuals. Though an individual believer may be considered as a planting of
the Lord (Mt 15:13), the Church must not be conceived of as a collection of
individual plants, rather, it must be conceived of as a tree (cf. Rom 11).
Children form part of the tree, as branches. If the branches do not bear fruit,
they would be cut off (Jn 15:6). But as long as they remain in the
congregation, they are covenantally holy (1 Cor 7:14) and are to be regarded as
members of the church.
Thus, when the congregation is addressed with the
singular second-person pronouns by the Lord, such as in the letters to the
seven churches in Revelation 2–3, the children are included. This is especially
clear in Deuteronomy 29:10–13 in which a gathered congregation, which
explicitly included little children, was addressed with the singular pronouns ‘thee’ and ‘thou’:
“That thou shouldest enter into covenant with the LORD thy God, and into his oath, which the LORDthy God maketh with thee this day: That he may establish thee to day for a people unto himself, and
that he may be unto thee a God, as he hath said untothee,
and as he hath sworn unto thy fathers, to Abraham, to Isaac, and to
Jacob” (Deut 29:12–13).
Naturally, then, when the church gathers for worship,
the children, being members of the church, should be included.
Biblical Pattern
Secondly, I believe that it is a biblical pattern that
children be included in congregation worship, together with their parents. In
the Old Testament, the Jews were seldom required to come together to worship
the Lord in the hearing and exposition of the Law, but when they did come
together the children were normally included in the worship. For examples,
firstly, at the renewal of the covenant recorded in Deuteronomy 29, we are
specifically told that the “little ones” (v. 11) were present. The word
translated “little ones” (¹f¾, taph) literally means: “those
who walk with quick tripping steps,” i.e., toddlers. Similarly at the
sabbatical year convocation, we
are told that not only were the men, but women, strangers and children, were to
be gathered and instructed: “When all Israel is come to appear before the LORD thy God in the place which he shall
choose, thou shalt read this law before all Israel in their hearing. Gather the
people together, men, and women, and children,
and thy stranger that is within thy gates, that they may hear, and that they
may learn, and fear the LORD your
God, and observe to do all the words of this law: And that their children, which have
not known any thing, may hear, and learn to fear the LORD your God…” (Deut 31:11–13). Then again, in Joshua 8:35, we are
told that “all the congregation
of Israel, with the women, and the little ones, and the strangers that were
conversant among them” attended to the reading of the Word by Joshua. And again
we read of similar gatherings during the time of Jehoshaphat (2 Chr 20:13) and
during the Reformation of Ezra (Neh 8:2–3; 12:43).
In the New Testament, when the people gathered to hear
our Lord, the young children were usually present too (see Mt 14:21; 15:38;
etc.). On one occasion, we are told that the people began bringing their young
children to the Lord to be touched by Him (Mk 10:13). For some reasons the
disciples tried to stop them. Perhaps they thought that the Lord should not be
encumbered with anything other than preaching or healing the sick. Perhaps they
had baptised the children, but their parents were not satisfied, and they
wanted the Lord at least to touch their children, believing that they could
receive a special blessing that way. Whatever the case, the disciples did not
think it necessary for the Lord to accede to their request and so they rebuked
them. We are told, however, that “when Jesus saw it, he was much displeased,
and said unto them, Suffer the little children to come unto me, and forbid them
not: for of such is the kingdom of God” (Mk 10:13–14). The word translated
‘little children’ here is the Greekpaidivon (paidion), which means “very
young child or infant.”
This statement of our Lord is instructive, for how do
we suffer the little children to come unto Christ in post-ascension Christian
worship, but to bring them to worship with the body of Christ?
Whatever the case may be, there is little doubt that
the practice of having children in the worship service was the norm in the
early church. This is suggested by the fact that the apostolic epistles, which
were read during congregational worship in the early church, addressed the
children directly (e.g., Eph 6:1; Col 3:20; and perhaps 1 Jn 2:12). In general, the biblical pattern is
that the Christian family, being heirs together in the covenant of grace, ought
to worship together. It is a
matter of historical fact that the exclusion of children from congregational
worship is a very recent innovation, which is probably an offshoot of the
Sunday School movement.
The Call of the Gospel
The third reason why children should worship with the
congregation is that the ordinary means by which God calls His people is the
preaching of the Word of God: “So then faith cometh by hearing, and hearing by
the word of God” (Rom 10:17).
Those with Arminian tendencies will generally insist
that there is such a thing as an “age of accountability,” before which a child
would not be held accountable for his or her sins or for rejecting the Gospel.
They reason that before such an age of accountability, which is generally
arbitrary, the child is incapable of conceptual thoughts. This “age of
accountability” is however an unscriptural idea based on secular psychology and
popular morality. The Scripture declares every child of Adam to be guilty
before God from the moment he is conceived (cf. Ps 51:5). Conversely, the
Scripture also indicates that it is possible for a child to be regenerated at a
very young age and so come unto faith and justification. John the Baptiser was
apparently regenerated while he was still in his mother’s womb. The angel
Gabriel had foretold this when he prophesied that “he shall be filled with the
Holy Ghost, even from his mother’s womb” (Lk 1:15). Then when Mary came to
visit John’s mother, the baby, sensing the presence of Christ, leapt for joy
(Lk 1:44).
From the example of John the Baptiser, we see that
regeneration is a sovereign work of God, not dependant on rational profession
of faith. Indeed, it is the consistent teaching of Scripture that regeneration
precedes faith. In the case of covenant infants, it is possible that the child
is regenerate long before he is able to express faith. Surely a regenerate
child would benefit from the preaching of the Word. John Willison puts it well
when he says: “Though children be young, yet bring them with you; for they are
capable of getting good by the word sooner than we are aware. … If we lay our
children by the pool-side, who knows how early the Spirit of God may help them
in, and heal them?” (Works, 77).
Moreover, experience has shown us that children as
young as a year and a half (as was a case of a little girl I know in London)
could understand adult conversation reasonably. Experience has also taught us
that children 4 to 5 years old could actually benefit from sermons and respond
to them by way of obedience.
Such being the case, it would be rather presumptuous
for the church or for parents to exclude their children from the preaching of
the Word of God, which is designed for the spiritual well-being of every member
in the church. Would it not be exceedingly strange for parents to pray for the
salvation of their infants and then remove them from the ordinary means
ordained to call them unto Christ?
The Praises of Babes and
Sucklings
The fourth rationale behind having children
worshipping with the congregation is that God is well-pleased with the praises
of babes and sucklings.
Those who advocate an age of accountability are also
likely to think that the praises of babes and sucklings are meaningless, since
they are unable to worship God consciously. This is however contrary to what
our Lord teaches. We read in Matthew 21 of how the children in the temple
praised the Lord with the words: “Hosanna to the Son of David” as they beheld
Him clearing the compound of those who bought and sold and exchanged money; and
healing the blind and the lame that came to Him (Mt 21:12–15). The chief
priests were displeased and so chided the Lord, but the Lord replied: “Yea;
have ye never read, Out of the mouth of babes and sucklings thou hast perfected
praise?” (Mt 21:16). The terms, “babes and sucklings,” as their designations
imply, refer to infants and babies who are still suckling, i.e., under 3 years
old since Jewish mothers were wont to nurse their babies till three. From our
Lord’s statement, we can be sure that God is especially honoured by the praises
of little children.
If this is the case, then, removing children from the
worship of the church would be like removing a range of violins from an
orchestra, or excising toes and fingers from the body.
The Training of Children
The
fifth reason why we include our children in worship is a pragmatic one, which
is to train our children to revere and worship God. Children who are taught to
sit still during worship when young are likely to grow up understanding the
importance of reverential worship. More than one godly persons I know have
expressed their gratitude to their fathers for disciplining them to keep them
still and quiet during worship when they were young. Matthew Henry, who was
himself trained from young, explains: “Little children should learn betimes to
worship God. Their parents should instruct them in his worship and bring them
to it, put them upon engaging in it as well as they can, and God will
graciously accept them and teach them to do better” (Comm. on 1 Samuel 1:19).
Also: “It is for the honour of Christ that children should attend on public
worship, and he is pleased with their hosannas” (Comm. on Luke 2:41).
Conclusion
Baptist churches, in general, which see children of
believing parents as being no different from children of pagan families, had
led the way of separating children from their parents during worship. We are
glad to know that even Baptist churches, that is, Calvinistic Baptist churches,
have begun to return to the old paths and are conscientiously including their
children in their worship services. It would be such a shame for us, who claim
to believe in God’s gracious covenant and favour towards His families, to
persist in doing what is right in our own eyes rather than what is warranted by
Scripture.
It is true that many children are unable to sit for
the duration of the sermon without becoming a distraction to their parents and
fellow worshippers, but I believe that this problem can be overcome by
persistent training, with the co-operation of a sympathetic congregation. It is
also true that many children areunable to understand adult sermons and would
become so accustomed to the sound of preaching that they would shut off
completely, so much so, that even when they are older and ought to be able to
understand, they will make no effort to listen. To overcome this problem, may I
suggest that parents, especially fathers, ought always to make sure that their
children pay attention during the worship and help them to understand the
sermon or at least the gist of it by taking simple notes during the sermon, and
discussing the sermon during family worship.
May the Lord help us to persevere as we seek to do
what is right and pleasing in the sight of God. May we neither bow to the
pressure for numerical growth nor humanistic reasonings, however pious they may
sound.Amen.
—JJ Lim